A Tangled Twist: From Finalist to Finally Sharing
Last October, A Tangled Twist was awarded Finalist for the 2024 Abstract Art Competition by Blue Koi Gallery. I didn’t rush to share. Today I decided to — here's why.
A Tangled Beginning
I applied to Blue Koy Gallery’s 2024 Abstract Art Competition just one month after choosing to focus on my art seriously. I was genuinely shocked and excited to receive the congratulatory email — it felt like the first of many milestones to come. Despite my excitement, I didn’t rush to share the news. My impostor syndrome took over.
Is this worth sharing? Do accolades mean anything in a society built on mediocrity? I’ve only been a real artist for two months... would anyone care? But here’s the thing — speaking up matters, this work matters, and I’ve always been an artist. So today I’m finally taking a moment to share.
A Tangled Twist captures that feeling of getting caught in racing thoughts, with soft, swirling shades of purple that stretch and twist like endless mental loops, and possibilities. It’s an abstract winding landscape that feels both chaotically introspective and calmly optimistic.
This piece has helped me unravel my inner thoughts and has brought me closer to understanding my neurodiversity. It means the world to me that A Tangled Twist resonated with jurors at Blue Koi Gallery.
Embracing the Weird
A Tangled Twist is the final piece of the first art series I released since departing a mediocre, bro-dominated, white-collar career in NYC advertising (more on that here.) The full series, Feeling Weird, explores internalized ableism a few years after I was diagnosed with ADHD / autism. It took years for me to accept my diagnosis. I still have moments of doubt. It’s a continual battle that seems to get better with time, making art, and advocating for my brain.
Another piece from the series, Sitting With Thoughts, brings attention to internalized hyperactive thoughts, while other works like Move Along Everyone, evoke the pull between losing oneself in the collective and the desire to break free — to live authentically. It’s a series rooted in vulnerability, self-awareness, and exploration. To understand and celebrate neurodivergent minds.
A Tangled Twist, along with the other nine mixed media pieces from Feeling Weird, challenge harmful, normalized ableism while looking at the dramatic effects internalized ableism has on one’s life. BBC’s article, Why an ADHD diagnosis can be a mixed blessing, by Christine Ro, explains that “There has never been a better time to talk about this issue. Under diagnosis is especially likely in girls and women and racial minorities, for reasons including the mislabelling that comes with stereotypes.”
Being undiagnosed and masking for nearly 24 years had tangled me in psychological, emotional, and other ways I’m sure I’ve yet to grasp (despite all the books I’ve read on the subject). What I do recognize is that labeling my disorder and receiving support in forms of medication and therapy has guided me to embrace who I am and live a more fulfilling life.
Moving Forward
The more we discuss our gifts with good intentions, to spread awareness about our real experiences, the easier it becomes to move towards a society that welcomes neurodiversity and rejects ableism. So yes, I’m sharing it. Because I’m done shrinking myself to be more digestible. I’m done hiding my disability to be more palatable in America. I’m over pretending that aiming to be as good as a mediocre man is good enough — because it’s simply not, and never will be. Mediocre men ain't sh*t. We're better than that, this art is better than that, the future is way better than that.
A Tangled Twist is currently on display (and available) at Big Whale Consignment. If you’d like to give it a home, feel free to contact me. Limited edition prints are available here.
Honoring this achievement is a taste of what's to come — and I can’t wait for what's next!
Cheers,
Tabitha